


Honesty

by CatsoftheApocalypse



Series: The One with the Supernatural Boys [10]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gadreel Possessing Sam Winchester, Smut, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-03-18 00:17:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3548960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatsoftheApocalypse/pseuds/CatsoftheApocalypse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Original Request:<br/>>>>One where the reader has a crush on Sam and they sleep together but she doesnt know its really Gadreel and when he gets back to his true vessel he comes back to see her and tells her the truth and they end up going at it again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Honesty

I sat on the edge of the bed, clutching the sheets to my otherwise bare body. This wasn’t exactly how I had thought or hoped this would happen. I didn’t regret last night. At all. But I was not sure if being as readily available as I had been would be exactly helpful in developing an emotional bond. I looked over my shoulder at the man sleeping behind me.  
Sam Winchester. Who would’ve thought that one of the two most well-known hunters in the States would show any interest in me. Not that I was a shitty hunter myself. But I didn’t expect to develop feelings for him. Yet, when he rolled into town with his brother while on a case – of course something had to come up in the shithole of a town where I was recuperating from a freaking near-death experience – we just sort of clicked. I had helped them out with research, so naturally I had had more contact with Sam. He was the brains of the duo, after all. Not that Dean was any less intelligent, but if I knew anything at all about the elder brother, it was that he was a man of action.  
There was just something about Sam… I wasn’t enchanted by his looks, although he was certainly easy on the eye. It was something else. Something I was unable to clearly define. When he had come to my door last night to tell me they had taken care of the Ghoul and were going to leave this morning, I had been unable to reign in my desires, so I had just grabbed him to draw him into a scorching kiss. Before we had even closed the door completely clothes were ripped, torn off bodies, my legs wrapped around his middle as he held me close and carried me towards the bed.  
Now he was sleeping peacefully, his face completely relaxed, as it dawned on me that I might very well never meet him again. The realization was like a bandage constricting my chest, making it difficult to breathe, but I bit back a shaky sob. I wasn’t going to cry about this. Hell, I only met him a week ago. I was a hunter. We couldn’t always – hardly ever, in fact – get what we wanted. I’d learned to live with that a long time ago.  
  
Two hours later, Sam’s phone rang. He was woken by the sound and sleepily reached for the small device.  
“Yes.” he answered curtly. “On my way.”  
He hung up and began to get dressed. I did not bother to put on any clothes since I was going to take a shower as soon as he left anyway, so instead I just wrapped the sheets around my body again.  
“I’m sorry I have to leave already.” he told me.  
I could see the sincerity shine from his eyes.  
“Don’t worry.” I waved his concern off. “I knew this was coming. No pun intended.”  
A small smile curved his lips.  
When he had collected his bearings, he moved towards the motel room’s door and I followed. His hand already on the handle, he turned to face me once more.  
“I will try to come back. I wish to see you again.” he said.  
I just nodded, not really registering his odd phrasing. Then he pulled me in for a slow, sweet kiss goodbye that made my skin tingle, one of my hands resting against his neck while the other still held the sheets tight around me. Only a moment later the kiss broke, and he was out of the door.  
  
  
  
~~~Intermission~~~  
  
  
  
“F/N?” I heard an unfamiliar voice ask behind me, and turned to face who was speaking.  
He was tall. And gorgeous. And he had a look in his eyes that managed to be determined, haunted and nervous at the same time. I was pretty sure I had never seen his face before – it wasn’t a sight easily forgotten – yet something about him felt familiar.  
“Do I know you?” I asked with a frown.  
“Not exactly.”  
“Then how do you know my name?”  
“I’m an… acquaintance of Sam Winchester’s.” he said, and I stiffened.  
I had spent months trying to get over that encounter, and my feelings were still raw.  
“Did he tell you to find me for a good time?” I hissed, narrowing my eyes.  
Not that I actually expected Sam to do such a thing. But he had said he’d try to come back to me. At the very least, he could have called and blown me off, instead of doing the fade-away.  
“No.” he stated, sadness mingling with the other components of his facial expression. “That is beneath him. I came of my own accord.”  
“And you’re here to do what exactly?”  
“I would very much like to speak with you. In private.”  
“You’re joking, right?” I was not exactly feeling threatened, but I was suddenly sort of grateful we were in a crowded bar. “I have no clue who you are, I don’t even know your name, and you want to be alone with me? Not a chance. Safety in numbers, buddy.”  
“My name is Gadreel.”  
I took a careful step back, my whole body suddenly on high alert, my muscles tense. There was only one kind of being with names like that. And from what I knew about them – granted, none of that was first-hand experience, but still – they were not exactly awesome company to keep.  
“Angel.” I hissed, and he nodded.  
When he saw the look on my face, he held up his hands to show he wasn’t about to rip me apart. All the while, the other patrons didn’t pay us any mind as they shoved past us, back and forth, sober, drunk, none of them interested in anybody but themselves. I wasn’t sure whether that was a blessing or a curse.  
“I am not here to make a scene.” he told me. “I just want to explain.”  
“Explain what? I never met you before. What could you have to explain to me?”  
“You have met me before. You may not know it, but it is true. I was in a different…”  
“Meatsuit?” I offered, more taunting than helpful.  
“Vessel.” he corrected. “I was in a different vessel back then.”  
I blinked, my mind racing. No. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be.  
“Who?” I gasped out.  
He was silent.  
“WHO???” I yelled.  
That finally managed to draw the attention of some of the other people in the bar towards us.  
“Sam Winchester.” Gadreel admitted, voice low, confirming my fear.  
I bolted past him and out of the murky dive, a sick feeling shooting into my gut.  
  
“I am truly sorry.”  
I flinched at the sound of his voice. In comparison, the stink in the dark back alley, populated only by us, rats and trash bins, didn’t faze me. I was supporting myself against the wall with one arm, bent towards the ground, my whole body convulsing, stomach heaving, but thankfully empty. Maybe it was a good thing after all that I hadn’t had any appetite all day.  
“Please let me-“  
“No!” I held out my hand, and he stopped in his tracks, not taking another step closer to me. “Stay right there. I don’t want you anywhere near me.” Hurt flashed across his face, but I didn’t care. “You just told me the guy I thought I slept with doesn’t even know it, and all you have to say for yourself is that you’re sorry. Sorry doesn’t cut it.”  
“He knows.”  
“What?” I whipped around to face him.  
“Sam knows very well what happened between you. It was him acting that night.”  
“But you just said… No. I know how possession works. You’re lying.”  
“I am not. It is hard to believe, but it is the truth. Sam was attracted to you. He was fully in control of his actions. You say you know how possession works. That night, I was…” he paused.  
“Enjoying the peepshow?”  
“Withdrawn.”  
“Why? Why would you possess someone and not take control?  
“I was trying to help him. He was nearly dead when his brother called on my kind for help. I was weak as well. Taking him as a vessel was the only way to save his life.”  
“Did it work? Is Sam okay?” I asked, concern momentarily overruling every other troubled emotion boiling within me.  
“Yes. He is alive and well. He was fully healed by another of my brothers.” Gadreel confirmed.  
“Another of your brothers? So you did this to him, and then bolted before finishing the job? You chickened out?”  
“That-“ he took a deep breath. “-is not what happened. Something occurred, and I took full control over him. But Dean and Castiel – my brother –“  
“The one who healed Sam?”  
“Yes.” he confirmed.  
“Go on.”  
“They managed to reach out to Sam, whom I had locked away in his own mind, and he ejected me.”  
“So you took hold of another poor sucker, and now you’re here? Why?”  
“Because I promised you.”  
“But I never talked to you. You said yourself that you were withdrawn.”  
“During that night, yes. But sometimes, when it seemed like he was lost in thought, even though you had just spoken to him, that was because it was me you had been talking to.”  
“And the morning he left… That… that kiss goodbye…”  
He nodded, backing up the realization that was dawning on me.  
“That was me. I am sorry for deceiving you in that moment. I had… difficulties holding myself back when you were close.”  
He looked sincere, but how could I believe a word that came from these stolen lips?  
What’s telling me that you aren’t lying right now?” I asked cautiously.  
“Nothing, I suppose.” he replied with a sad smile. “I can only ask that you believe me, not force you to. But I care about your good opinion. Whatever it is you wish to hear from me to make you believe what I say, you only have to tell me.” he pleaded, almost begged.  
“How about the truth? All of it. Who you are, what you did. No leaving out unpleasant details, no glossing over mistakes. Will you do that?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.  
“If you wish. Yes.”  
  
“I was tasked with protecting the Garden. It was an honor to be chosen to guard the epicenter of Creation.” he began his story, with me interrupting him right away.  
“”Hang on!” I held up my hand. “The Garden? Epicenter of Creation? You’re not talking about Eden, are you?”  
“Some call it that.” he nodded.  
“So, if you’re starting your story there, I take it it’s going to be a long one?”  
“It is.”  
“Then walk with me. It’s cold, and I feel like I’ll need some sleep after this. My motel’s that way.” I pointed.  
Gadreel resumed speaking as we made our way through the night. By the time we reached the motel, his tale had reached the point where he possessed Sam. As crazy as it would have sounded to others, I believed him. Every word. I unlocked my door and gestured for him to enter. He hesitated briefly, but I repeated the motion and he stepped inside.  
Taking off my jacket after I had closed the door, I turned around to look at him.  
“So… you and Dean tricked Sam into letting you in.”  
“yes. He was dying, and Dean was desperate. It shames me that I took advantage of that.” he said, looking away.  
I sat cross-legged on the bed and gestured to the free space.  
“You did it to save a good man’s life, didn’t you? Sit. Go on.”  
He took the seat I offered him and picked up where he had left off.  
When he told me about killing the prophet, Kevin, I sucked in a sharp breath and tears tingled in my eyes. Sam, and especially Dean, had spoken of Kevin frequently and very highly. They considered him more than just a close friend. He was family to them. I was too afraid to ask about Dean’s reaction, so I just kept listening instead.  
  
“All those people…” I whispered when he ended his story. “All those people you killed. Your brothers and sisters. How do you live with it?”  
“Since Metatron has been defeated, I have been doing something similar to what Castiel did when he returned from Purgatory.”  
I nodded. Dean had told me about spending time there, unwillingly.  
“I have been travelling. Doing penance. I help where I can. Small things. I am well aware that forgiveness is beyond my reach, but the mission remains.”  
He gave me another sad smile, and I felt butterflies. It was the same smile that had had me falling for Sam. Or who I thought to be Sam at the time, at least. I scooted just a little bit closer to him, and his expression changed to one of utter surprise.  
“There’s one thing I don’t understand.” I said.  
“What is it?” he asked, curious.  
“You said you sacrificed you life. Killed yourself.” I began, and he nodded. “Then how are you here?”  
“That, I do not know. After… the prison, I woke up on Earth. I do not recollect how. I was at full power, my wings healed. But I can not tell you how or why.”  
“Okay. I…” I was about to tell him I believed him, but one thing still bugged me.  
“Yes?” he prompted, sensing my reluctance.  
“I have one more question.”  
“Then ask it. Whatever it is you wish to know, you have but to ask.”  
“The man this body belonged to…” I gestured, and something animalistic deep within me screamed at me, commanding me to pounce on him and make him mine. But I couldn’t Not before he answered this question. “…where is he?”  
Gadreel sighed deeply before looking back up a me.  
“When I did what I did in Heaven, this body died. The soul it belonged to went where it was supposed to. And when I was revived in this form… it did not return.” he cast his eyes down again.  
“Did he have a family?”  
“No. He was a good man, but he was alone.”  
“So you’re the only one in there? There’s no one else but you?”  
“Yes. For all intents and purposes, this is my-“  
He was cut off when my body collided with is and our lips met in a bruising kiss. For a moment, he froze in surprise, but then he reciprocated. Passionately so. Our lips melting against one another’s, our tongues at war, we were caught in a mist of desire until we needed to catch a breath, inevitably having to break apart. I knelt in front of him and leaned my forehead against his.  
“Good.” I breathed, my hands resting on his shoulders.  
I was by no means happy that the man born into this body was dead, but it took some pressure off my mind that Gadreel was the only one inhabiting it. One might wonder how it was possible that I wanted him so much after how disgusted I had been earlier, but during the time it had taken for him to tell his story I had noticed things about him. Little quirks. Certain facial expressions. Things I used to associate with Sam. Things that now had me realize that it had never really been Sam I had fallen for. Sure, he was disturbingly attractive, but that had never been all that drew me in. And all the other things that did were now revealed to be Gadreel’s quirks.  
“Why are you doing this?” he asked, his hands on my waist.  
“Why did you come back?” I questioned in return.  
“I promised, as I said.”  
“That’s the only reason?”  
“No.”  
“Then why?”  
“Because I wanted to.”  
“There you go.” I said, touching my lips to his, the kiss softer this time. “That’s why I’m doing this as well.”  
“Are you certain?” he asked, doubt and hope mingling in his eyes.  
“Absolutely.” I confirmed.  
Just like that, I was lying on my back, Gadreel above me. The pressure of his body against mine was delicious, although most of his weight was supported by his arms to my left and right.  
“Somebody’s eager.” I giggled when he released my lips.  
“Would you rather have me stop?”  
“Don’t you dare.” I growled, catching him off guard as I flipped him over, straddling him.  
I bent to kiss him, then letting my lips travel across his jaw line and down his neck to the collar of the T-Shirt he wore under a halfway unzipped hoodie. His breathing already uneven, ever so slightly, his hands flexed where they were resting on my hips as I unzipped the hoodie fully and took the edge of the shirt’s collar between my teeth, pulling it away before letting it snap back into place, then stating the obvious.  
“There’s too much fabric on your body. Mine too. We should get rid of that.” I breathed, my lips close to his ear.  
We both sat up and I pushed the hoodie off his shoulders first, then pulling up his T-Shirt, my fingertips gliding over his skin in the process. When his chest was bare, I took a moment to admire him. He reached out tentatively, caressing the skin that showed between my shirt and jeans, and his eyes met mine.  
“May I?” he asked, hesitant.  
I nodded my approval, and my top was quickly disposed of. My hands on his neck, I pulled him in for a kiss and he held me close, his hands travelling my back. My chest was pressed against his while he unsnapped my bra, then slowly pulling the straps off my shoulders, the superfluous garment hitting a wall as he threw it away. He kissed down my neck and along my collarbone, a hand paying soft attention to my breast while his lips made their way to the other. I threw my head back and bit my lip in delight as his tongue trailed over my nipple, his lips then closing around the delicate bud, sucking and nibbling gently.  
Slowly, he lowered me back onto the mattress, all the while continuing his ministrations to my chest. I traced the muscles of his back with my fingertips, before pulling him back up to meet his lips in a kiss. As our mouths worked against each others, my hands were busy with his belt buckle, then moving on to the button and zipper of his jeans, one of his hands doing the same to me. I pushed the denim as far off his hips as I could, clearly indicating what was to go next. A low rumble sounded from his throat and he broke the kiss to scoot downwards, his lips once more travelling my skin from my neck to my collarbones, the valley between my breasts, my stomach, right down to the very edge of my panties beneath the open zipper of my jeans. He placed a determined kiss on the fabric before smirking up at me.  
“Please.” I begged lowly, desire gnawing away at my patience.  
He hooked his fingers under both layers and slowly pulled them down my legs, admiring every inch of me that was exposed in the process, then standing on bare feet, both our shoes and socks long since kicked off, to remove his own, giving me an opportunity to admire him in all his glory as well.  
“Wait!” I gasped as he crawled back onto the bed.  
Hurt invaded his eyes, but he was wrong to assume I had changed my mind.  
“Don’t look at me like that.” I smiled. Neither of us is going anywhere anytime soon. Lie down and let me give you a treat before the main event.”  
My smile became a smirk as confusion clouded his features.  
It was washed away by bliss as soon as my lips surrounded his tip. I swirled my tongue, tasting salt, taking him in further, grazing my teeth along his length as I pulled back up. The plentiful moans escaping him spurred me on, and when he reached out with one hand, I caught it in one of my own, intertwining our fingers. His other hand tangled into my hair, not applying any pressure, just keeping my movements steady. I felt the veins on his length as I let my tongue ripple across the sensitive skin. His hand squeezing mine, hearing his moans and exclamations of pleasure, I felt my own need continue to grow. When his fingers tightened against my scalp, I pulled back with a delighted sigh.  
He looked at me, frowning.  
“Why did you stop?”  
“Because we’ll have plenty of time for more of that later. But now, I want you.”  
He sat up, looking amazed, what about I did not know, and I inched forward until our lips crashed together, his hands both in my hair now, my own clutching at his shoulders as my center met his and I sank down, taking him in.  
I rolled my hips, creating more friction, lifting myself before lowering down again, all of him gliding back into me. Repeating these motions, again and again, his movements beneath me, within me, heightening every sensation that washed over the both of us, I still had to admit that my thighs began to burn, even through the lust veiling my thoughts. I was getting closer and closer to fulfillment, and I could tell he was, too, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep this up long enough. Maybe he sensed my growing discomfort, or maybe ha just fancied a change in position, but in any case, his hands fell to my hips and he guided me off him, moving so I was lying on my back and he hovered above me. A whine escaped me, my core empty, and I was ever so delighted when he entered my body again. At first, his thrusts were slow and deliberate, but when I wrapped my legs around his middle, the better accommodating what I desired, he soon began to gain speed. Every stroke met my sweet spot with a precision that astonished me.  
…Closer…  
My nails dug into his back, that familiar coil nearly ready to break.  
…Almost there…  
His thrusts grew erratic, less timed.  
…Just a little more…  
The air was thick with infinite moans, sighs and gasps resounding from the walls.  
…Nearly-  
Something snapped within me, causing me to clutch him close, all of him flush against all of me, pressed into my core as deep as he would reach, and I came hard, my climax triggering his. As bliss crashed over us in waves I sank my teeth into his shoulder to keep from screaming my pleasure out loud. Gadreel had no such reservations and called out my name at the top of his lungs.  
We stayed like that until our highs wore off, little by little.  
Sated, I let my head fall back into the pillows and Gadreel moved to lie beside me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close, so that my body was molded against the side of his, our legs tangled together, and I was nuzzling his neck wit a satisfied hum.  
“May I ask a question?” he rumbled.  
“Are you always this polite?”  
“Usually, yes.”  
“Huh… But you had a question. Ask away.”  
“Earlier…” he hesitated. “…you implied we might have more time together. Did you mean that?”  
There was a hopeful undertone in his voice that made my heart melt. I raised my head, the better to look at him.  
“Are you saying you want to stay with me?” I asked for reassurance.  
His faithful face fell.  
“Forgive me. It was presumptuous of me. I should have known you would wish me to-“  
“Hey, hey, hey, settle down! I was just making sure I heard you right. I’ll take that as a yes.”  
He had turned his head to look away from me, and I reached out to turn him back, leaving my hand there to rest on his cheek.  
“I did mean it.” I said, and he smiled happily when I pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “If you want to stick around, I’d be happy to have you.”  
“Thank you.” he sighed, his hold on me tightening.  
“I feel like I have to thank you, not the other way around.”  
“What ever would you have to thank me for?”  
“Your honesty.” I replied, kissing him again.  
In my book, it was looking pretty good for an emotional bond now.


	2. Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another chance meeting with the Winchesters, a ghost, and a bruised hip. Oh, and jealousy, of course...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a demand for a jealous Gadreel, so here he is. Kind of.

“Sam? Dean? Is that you?”  
The two men turned around to face me.  
“F/N?” Dean asked doubtfully before cracking a wide smile.  
He came closer and enveloped me in a giant hug. Sam just stood awkwardly aside.  
“How’ve you been? Are you all healed up?” the elder brother asked, referring to the extensive injury I had still been healing from when we first met.  
“Yeah, perfectly.” I replied, my eyes drifting to Sam, who still made no move whatsoever to properly greet me. “Sam, aren’t you even gonna say hello?” I asked.  
He looked at his brother, who took the hint and walked off to where they’d parked their car.  
“F/N, I-“  
“Sam, don’t bother. Just because we hooked up once things don’t have to be awkward between us now. I admit that I did have a bit of a crush on you, or thought that I did, but a lot has happened since then.”  
“You have no idea.”  
“I think that I do.”  
He looked at me questioningly.  
“I met someone, you know.” I informed him, avoiding the fact that it was the angel who had been possessing him the night we’d had sex.  
“Who is he? Fellow hunter? Local?”  
“I… it’s complicated. Let’s talk about it later.”  
He nodded, and we walked over to where Dean was waiting.  
“You two good?” he asked, looking between me and his younger brother.  
“Of course.” I told him. “Just needed to clear something up. So… I assume you guys are here because of the O’Donnell house?”  
It was an abandoned villa on the outskirts of town which had been rumored to be haunted for years. Recent incidents had given those rumors some backup.  
“Yup.” Dean confirmed.  
“Guys, I hate to tell you, but you’re a little late. I’ve already got it figured out.”  
“Do you now?”  
“Yeah. It’s just going to be a simple salt’n’burn. Just a pissed-off ghost.”  
“How do you know?”  
“Well…” I looked around to check that we were alone on the indeed deserted street before I pulled up the edge of my shirt and shoving my jeans down a bit, revealing a large bruise forming on my left hip, at the sight of which Sam’s eyes widened and Dean sucked in a sharp breath. “I was there a few hours ago, just before dawn. Bastard of a ghost tried to lock me in, and then he was stupid enough to literally throw me out the window. Couldn’t follow me, of course. Apparently, he wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed in life either. You wanna know how he died?” The two men nodded that they did. “His wife caught him cheating and proceeded to castrate him with a kitchen knife. He bled out.”  
A shudder ran through all of us at the thought.  
“Did you find out where he’s buried yet?” Sam questioned.  
I gave him my best bitch face and Dean chuckled.  
“Of course I did. Do you guys wanna help me dig him up tonight?”  
“Sure thing.” they said simultaneously.  
“Nice. In the meantime, I’ll go back to my motel and freshen up.”  
“Where’re you staying? We can drop you off.”  
“That would be great. Red Hen Motel.”  
“Would you look at that.” Dean grinned. “We’re staying there too.”

We all got to the motel and went to our respective rooms after having agreed that they would come get me by sundown.  
“Hey.” I greeted Gadreel, who was sitting on the bed, randomly flipping channels on the TV without using the remote.  
He got up and came over to me, cupping my face in both his hands and planting a firm kiss on my lips.  
“How did it go?” he asked.  
“Oh, you know, the usual. Found a pissed-off ghost. Met the Winchesters.”  
His body went rigid at my words.  
“Do they know I’m here?”  
“No. I told them I met someone, but not that it was you. I wasn’t sure whether you’d want that.”  
“At some point, I’ll have to face them. I would-“  
He was interrupted by a knock on the door. With a sigh, I opened.  
“Sam? I thought we were gonna meet later.”  
“Yeah, we are. I’m just dropping off your phone.” he said, handing me the device. “Must’ve fallen out of your pocket in the backseat.”  
“Thanks.”  
“I heard you talking. Was that your mystery man?”  
I nodded nervously.  
“Can I meet him? I’d just like to tell him he’d better take good care of you.”  
“I don’t know…” I turned my head to look at Gadreel, hidden from sight by the door, and he nodded his agreement. “Okay.” I sighed, opening the door fully.  
Sam hissed when he saw who was with me, and roughly shoved me behind him. I yelped in pain when he accidentally hit my bruised hip in the process. At the sound, anger flared up in Gadreel’s eyes. He took a step forward, but I shook my head no at him and he stopped.  
“Dean!!!” Sam called loudly, and Dean came running across the lot, leaving their rooms door wide open.  
“Sam, what’s wrong?” He saw Sam’s protective stance in front of me and frowned. “What’s going – sonofabitch!”  
Dean had looked through the door and seen Gadreel, his hands now moving to draw his gun.  
“Guys, calm down!” I demanded. Nothing. “Seriously, let me through!”  
When they didn’t budge, I elbowed them both in the ribs and shoved my way back into my room, yanking my wrist from Sam’s grip when he tried to hold me back. I went to stand next to Gadreel and entangled my fingers with his.  
“Dean, put your gun away, and then you both come inside so we can talk about this like civilized people.”  
F/N, you don’t-“  
“Now!!!” I commanded, interrupting Sam’s protest.  
Reluctantly, the brothers did as they were told.  
“You don’t know who he is. What he did.” Dean accused me.  
“Believe me, I am perfectly aware who he is. And one of the things he did was, I believe, to kill himself so your friend Castiel and you could save Heaven and Earth.”  
“Of course he told you the one good thing.” Sam scoffed.  
“Sam, Dean, I-“ Gadreel tried to enter the conversation, but didn’t get any further.  
“Nobody’s talking to you, feathers.” Dean barked, and Gadreel’s hand tightened around mine.  
I returned the gesture in what I hoped was a reassuring manner.  
“he told me the good things he did.” I stated. “He told me the bad things he did. He told me everything.”  
“You can’t actually believe that.”  
“I do, Sam. Without a doubt.”  
“This is ridiculous!” Dean mumbled before he left without another word.  
Sam looked between the open door, me, and Gadreel before making up his mind and following his brother. When I made moves to go after them, Gadreel stopped me.  
“Please don’t go.”  
“I have to. I don’t want things between them and me to end like this. And there’s still bones to burn.” I stood in front of him, taking both his hands in mine. “I’ll go now, see if I can make them understand. At least finish off the spirit together. I’ll be back tonight at the latest.” I promised, then pecking his lips and running after the Winchesters.

When I finally got them to shut up long enough for me to actually explain everything that had happened, everything Gadreel had told me, they did… not exactly understand, I assumed, but at least accept. There was no way around it, anyway, that I was a grown woman and just because we’d worked together before and were working together again now, or even because I happened to have slept with one of them, they were not the bosses of me. They didn’t like it, but they didn’t have to.  
“So you’re really in love with him?” Sam asked for what felt like the hundredth time.  
I didn’t fail to notice how inappropriate it was that he was questioning me about the inner workings of my heart while we desecrated a fifty year old grave, but answered anyway.  
“Yes.”  
“Why?”  
“if you must know… When he came to find me, and told me his story, without keeping anything secret… I noticed things about him. I told you this morning that I had a crush on you, but then, I realized that wasn’t quite correct. Most of the things that had me falling for you were never really yours. They were his.”  
“Thanks.” Sam murmured, sounding disappointed.  
“Hang on… You’re not jealous, are you?” I asked.  
Sam turned to look at Dean, who was graciously humming some song to give us at least an illusion of privacy.  
“No… Okay, yes. A little. I admit I never intended to call you again, but I still hoped to have left more of an impression. You’re a great girl, F/N.”  
“And you’re a great guy. There’s no denying that. You’re just not…”  
“That guy. I understand.”  
just a few minutes later, we stood over the burning remains of yet another creature dealt with, casually making arrangements to meet up for breakfast the next morning before the boys would leave town. Gadreel and myself would stay a little longer, since another hunter I had business with was on his way to meet me here. then we got into the Impala and went back to the motel.

“Gadreel?” I asked into the darkness of the room, closing the door behind me.  
Why hadn’t he turned on the lights? Without an answer, and still without light, I suddenly felt myself being pushed back against the door, hot lips attacking mine, one hand on my neck and another feeling me through my clothes, wandering down my side. Surprised as I was, I was actually enjoying this. That was, until-  
“Ouch!!!” I called loudly.  
In a flash, Gadreel’s hands and lips were gone and the lights flickered on.  
“I’m so sorry, I did not mean to hurt you.” he said, still standing close in front of me.  
“You didn’t.” I protested, and he frowned. “Okay, you did, but it wasn’t your fault.” I specified, lifting my shirt and pulling my jeans down a bit for the second time today.  
Gadreel gasped when he saw the large bruise that colored my skin a mix of purple, blue and brown.  
“How did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, his fingers hovering just millimeters from my skin.  
“The spirit kind of threw me out a window this morning. I didn’t tell you because all the Winchester-mess got in the way.”  
He frowned again and carefully touched my bruised hip, causing nothing but a slight sting instead of the throbbing pain a firmer touch would have produced. I felt a tingle, and when I looked down, the bruise was gone.  
“There.” he said, sounding pretty satisfied with himself. “Better?”  
I smiled and laid my hands on the back of his neck, pulling him towards me.  
“Much better. Thank you.”  
Our lips met, and though the resulting kiss started out sweet, that sweetness quickly morphed back into the raw, demanding passion from before. Gadreel pressed me against the door once more, his body flush against mine, his hands already at work, opening buttons and pulling down zippers. Before I knew it, I was naked before him, feeling the cool, thin wood against my back and his strong, warm body in front of me. He moved his lips from mine, nibbling his way down my throat and sucking hard on my sweet spot in the juncture between my neck and my shoulder.  
“Hey!” I gasped, and he growled in acknowledgment. “I’m not complaining here, on the contrary, but I would like to even out the game.” I pointed out, tugging at his shirt.  
In the blink of an eye, he was just as naked as me, still running his hands all over my bare skin, and I began to do the same to him. It was true, I wasn’t complaining, for as different as this was, it was also oh-so-exciting. Usually, he would worship my body slowly, reverently, and I would let him, adrift in the feeling his touches evoked, but this…  
A soft whimper escaped me when one of his hands slipped between my thighs and he harshly rubbed the sensitive peak of my need for him.  
“Please…” the words left me as nothing more than panting breaths. “… quit messing around.”  
He groaned and hoisted me up, pushing into me without further ado while I was still busy wrapping my legs around him. He pounded into me, fast, relentless, my uncontrolled moans sounding loudly in the room. My nails were scratching at his shoulders, his teeth and lips covering my chest in love bites and his fingers digging into my hips, surely hard enough to leave new bruises there. I would make sure for him not to heal those. Not when they were the result of him truly letting go and basking in his emotions for the very first time. I could find out which ones that were later.  
The familiar tightening he so expertly knew how to cause began in the depths of my stomach, and quickly. Half of me didn’t want this to be over, the other half was already chasing the high of what was sure to be an incredible orgasm.  
His movements became even faster, yet still not losing their precision, my hips moving to meet his every thrust with perfect synchronicity. I was so incredibly close, and though I could have held my climax back for at least I little while longer had I wanted to, I could not find the will, or even the desire, to do so. My vision blurred as I let go and threw my head back, only faintly aware of the sound it created when it hit the door. I was too much awash in the incomparable sensations coursing through me, heightened even more when I felt Gadreel pulse inside me, halting every movement, his climax sparked by mine.  
When both our breathing had calmed, my hands tangled in his hair and our foreheads leaned together, He slowly pulled away and out of me. He did not set me down, however, but shifted me until I was cradled in his arms. Then he carried me over to the bed, on which he placed me ever so gently, pulling the sheets to cover my body before he slipped in next to me. I cuddled up to him and he wrapped his arms around me as I kissed his chest.  
“So, what brought this on?” I asked quietly.  
“I was afraid of losing you. To a better man than I could ever be.”  
“Huh. who ever knew I could make two incredible men jealous in just one day? Let me tell you, there is no better man than you. Not for me.” I said, looking up at him.  
He smiled softly.  
“Still, I was afraid.  
“Why?”  
“I love you.”  
Astonished, I pulled back to get a better view of him.  
“You never said that before.” I pointed out.  
“I was waiting for the right moment. But since that may never come-“  
“It did.” I interrupted him. “Just now. that was the right moment. The perfect moment. And you know what else?”  
“What?”  
“I love you too.”  
I did not even have time to blink before his lips pressed to mine. When he’d kissed me breathless, he pulled back slightly, the tips of our noses still touching. I took a few moments to take in his happy expression and catch my breath before speaking again.  
“So, does this mean I have to make you jealous every time I want it a little rougher in the bedroom?”

**Author's Note:**

> Keep the comments coming. Let me know if/how you like it!  
> Especially you, Requester!
> 
> If anyone has any requests, let me know, and I'll think about it.


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